It began with a kiss and ended with a kiss. And thus ends the relationship I had hoped to never end. She says she’s not ready to love anyone, but she still loves me. *sigh* At least I’m not crying anymore. There was nobody for me to go to either. Bob wasn’t home, and Nagi wasn’t online… so I just crashed at Bobs house and waited for him to get home. Maybe do some work to get my mind off stuff… *sigh*

3 months. I guess I shouldn’t have expected much more than that, but I guess I’m an optimist. Always expect things to turn out all right. Oh well, I guess I’ll always be like that. One of these times, things will actually turn out all right… they have to, right?

*sigh* So, thats the end. Love isn’t one of my favorite emotions right now, and I doubt I’ll be wanting to feel it again for a long long time.

I guess I go back to wandering down strange paths and not caring where they lead. Because they have to lead somewhere, and it has to be better than here.

And no matter how much I hate love, I shall always love Aubree. I have for three years, and so I guess I can’t stop now. But I guess I put my heart back into it’s package. Wrap it in bubblewrap… and put it into storage. I won’t be needing it. Not where I’m going. And it’ll only get in the way.

I’ve finished my crying.

Now I need to get moving towards the future.

See you in that future….
Matt

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Filed under: Uncategorized - @ October 20, 2001 8:45 pm